Somehow I ended up on a baby naming website tonight.

I meant to check my bank statement but in the course of 20 seconds, I ended up on a webpage I had never intended to be on.

I have baby on my mind CONSTANTLY. Everywhere I go I see pregnant women and babies. Right after I had my first, all I saw were thin women and teenagers in mini skirts and tube tops. And yes, on my period, all I see is chocolate bars and hamburgers... but now, everyday, it's baby after baby after baby.

The world is suddenly full of babies and I'm that creepy person that just stares at them in public, I'm not the weirdo that asks to hold them or randomly goes up and touches them... at least not yet.

But jesus, I'm killing myself this way, a true masochist, I just love the pain of my own breaking heart.